Boundaries of success?

Do find myself focusing on boundaries, and a right to personal space we all should have. Looking for a concept that gives some guidance in trying to understand success. That maybe it is not really just about appearance of being successful, but finding your safe space, with people around you protected in their own, and protective of yours.

To me at least as a concept seems worthy. Where readily admit is something would like to have where put it out there as a concept thinking is something where others agree.

Past focus was possibly more on systems where people have expected roles around things like gender, and in other areas where thankfully in our times is greatly diminished. Where fewer accept for instance the notion that some people are just born into a lower class which is just their fate.

Merit should matter and what you can do with your efforts can elevate not just you but your society, is a better idea taking hold of a world and nations, when nations actually wish to compete well on the global stage.

You cannot compete well in our modern world with a country finding best efforts from ALL its citizens if you are arbitrarily restricting some of yours. Your country just will not be as competitive as the best.

Gender equality is better. And feel like society is trending towards meaningful and real gender equality where we know it still isn't here yet from too many unfortunate stories and statistics about things like the gender wage gap. Social roles are adjusting.

Views that still dominated when I grew up are outdated in a world where either gender can work together equally to support a family, if a couple wishes to have one. And gender can be irrelevant as to how that works out. Of course women still have the children, but families take care of them. And best society simply supports children brought up well and protected. As someone who has admitted suffering abuse as a child better appreciate how important that is.

And people who have been through such, and most survive though unfortunately some tragically do not, can find a way am sure. And as work towards a better safety, feel like am in that way working towards real success.

Other things then can simply challenge it, like money and celebrity that could draw more of the kind of people who can test boundaries.

We have a world of systems which actually work very well in plenty of places and others struggle more, where can be a question of what is most important, as to how to judge what is success.

We can't help but care in some way what others think about us. If that seems challenging consider what happens if you decide against cultural mores in some area public. Police may be called. Even better to imagine a situation where you have seen such, which is likely if lived in a major city.

Find myself thinking about shaving as an activity shared across genders in the US. And looked forward to it when young, as a sign of maturity. And after decades of shaving or not, if wanted a beard like to pay attention to how I feel about the hair that will relentlessly grow. For women here have learned is primarily about legs and armpits which did not think about much until recently. Does that show how single have been most of my life?

Other side of it is, don't think I'd care in a relationship and thinking back can't remember one way or the other on relationships have had, but is that about just taking something for granted?

Part of me wonders about boundaries of the subject in this context. Is it appropriate? Was talking about success and systems and suddenly am talking shaving and relationships and opinion about whether or not I care if women shave their legs?

Where do we find the lines in life, especially with what is put forward to others publicly? I think it is about a sense which says will leave the above. As otherwise the words would simply have been removed like so many others in the process of writing.

As random as may seem highlights to me reality of things done primarily for others, and brings to my mind questions about to what extent how we feel about ourselves is about our success in how we feel others perceive us.

Having your attention though if still reading, there is that concern that in keeping your attention might use that interest or attempt to use in some way not helpful.

There has been much revealed recently also especially about abuse of power, where reality is tend to be males who try to leverage some position to breach accepted boundaries. And to me really IS about boundaries, respecting the space of other people. And more that is accepted, less likely people are to cross lines.

Personal space is very personal, and the signals we send should be accepted by others. Reading through so many stories recently jumps out how appropriate boundary signals were relentlessly ignored by predatory people. To such people personal boundaries were made to be crossed and would simply relentlessly test and breach, and even rely on physical force. Then look to legal means to silence victims and escape accountability.

With the need to provide things of interest to others, our monetary systems can also push people to find what is of value to others, and with best professionalism, can give tremendous satisfaction in doing your best, if properly paid. Where the pressure has long been on you to figure that one out, or at least be with people who do their best to pay appropriately.

But how do you know? Thankfully in our times, there is the ability to share pay information through the web widely and to check. Talking pay is helpful for a world of people to be properly paid.

There are just going to be situations in life when you need someone who is approving in some way of what you are doing, which can give a certain power in and of itself, to say, yes or no. Especially if you want to get paid at something.

Gatekeepers I like to call them. Admit do not like to face them. Classic is the job interview. In entertainment is the audition. But gist of it is lots of places there are people who will decide whether they need you for some occupation or not.

And what if that gatekeeper pushes requirements that have nothing to do with value you can bring in the broad, but is all about some monstrous person selfishly looking to use you in that moment?

Problem with attracting attention can be is not picky. Is best when you attract decent people, but nothing in the word has that filter.

You can actually simply attract all kinds which I think will be for the most part people who at least try to be decent.

Public reality at least pressures us to behave a certain way or society will tend to control our behavior for us, as best can. Disruptions to others can NOT be accepted if society is to function well, and especially doing harm to others with impunity is just not justified. Can be more problematic if not in public though, if somehow cornered by the wrong person, looking to get away with something.

Finding your boundaries in life is a lot not just about knowing your personal space, but defending well. No matter though you may find yourself cornered or trapped by a villain. Our best efforts can only defend so much, and do need society defending well too. And respecting boundaries is a lot about society functioning best.

The measures of success will am sure always be much about many things, but am sure there is a greatness to finding your space with people who respect, whom you respect to enjoy those other things.

Maybe simply am talking about success from finding peace of mind. Which is a measure of success known from wisdom from way back. Find that comforting to consider.

Boundaries of success are ours to find. Focusing on defining those boundaries to me? Is key.


James Harris

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